1. Any place that actually has good BBQ is going to have a line around the block.
But in the end it’s certainly worth the wait.
2. If someone is wearing a ring that resembles a Super Bowl trophy, you can bet that they went to A&M.
3. The high school football games are so big, they are sometimes played in professional stadiums
4. and many of the home venues are bigger than college bowls.
5. You have a hard time explaining mums to out-of-staters.
It’s pretty much a huge grouping of flowers that you spend a ton of money on and only wear for one day.
6. Nothing signifies a change of the season like a Shiner seasonal brew.
7. You know that taking the tollway means you can haul ass.
8. Even if you don’t own a gun, you probably know how to use one.
9. H-E-B is your store for EVERYTHING.
10. It’s one of the few places where chicken-shit bingo is actually a thing.
Never have so many people actually paid attention to a chicken shitting.
11. And Hill Country Fare can hold its own against any brand-name product.
12. Seeing a horse at a fast food joint is not out of the ordinary.
13. If a small town has only one chain restaurant, you can bet your ass it’s a Dairy Queen.
The Texas stop sign.
14. Jim Adler and Brian Loncar are a hilarious part of daytime TV.
The Texas Hammer and the Strong Arm.
15. Chances are you know someone who works in the oil field.
16. You routinely see souped-up trucks that easily cost more than any luxury car.
17. You literally count down the days until the State Fair starts
18. and you took the bus to the Houston Rodeo because you wouldn’t want to miss the biggest spectacle around.
19. If you’re ever traveling on 35, you make it a point to grab some kolaches from Czech Stop.
20. As a kid, you couldn’t wait for summer, because that usually meant a trip to Schlitterbahn.
The hottest coolest time in Texas!
21. And as an adult, summer usually means cold beers and a long float along the Guadalupe or Comal River.
22. Spring break means heading down to Coca-Cola Beach at South Padre Island.
Or if you couldn’t make it that far, Port Aransas was a viable alternative.
23. You have seen your fair share of secede gear.
Bumper stickers, T-shirts, and posters! Oh my!
24. A good pair of Lucchese boots costs more than an entire wardrobe
25. and you are very opinionated on how they should be worn.
26. Many of your most memorable nights have been spent at Whataburger at 3 a.m.
27. When driving from one major city to another, it’s never just a short trip.
28. And the term wide open spaces was certainly meant for West Texas.
29. When you hear the weather forecast, you pay more attention to the heat index than the temperature.
30. Austin is a countercultural island in a state of red.
31. It’s always been very easy to tell which way the state leans.
32. Every region has its own very specific opinions about the others.
33. Hate ïem or love ïem, all eyes will always be on the Cowboys.
34. And there is no greater Texas basketball dynasty than the San Antonio Spurs.
Tim, Manu, and Tony: the real big three.
35. This man is an absolute legend.
Nolan Ryan, a Texas original.
36. Y’all has its own vocabulary rules.
37. Topo Chico is always a great hangover cure.
38. Holiday season also means tamale season.