Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

Yesterday Alton Brown stopped by Lifestyle Hacker to answer a series of hard-hitting questions.

Some questions were food-related, some were TV-related, and some were absolutely ridiculous and related to nothing really. But, seeing as the best-selling author and James Beard Award winner has been a television personality for over 15 years, he has a quip for just about everything.

1. Cheese or chocolate?

Cheese or chocolate?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

2. Sandwich cutting: diagonal or down the middle?

Sandwich cutting: diagonal or down the middle?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

3. What’s your dream sandwich?

What's your dream sandwich?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

UhmmmÄ Explain?

Uhmmm... Explain?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

Ah.

Ah.Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

It’s a bacon, avocado, sardine, ham, mustard, and melted cheese sandwich on a mix of sourdough and rye bread ã multiple slices of each, it looks like ã plated with pickles.

4. What’s the one junk food you could never give up to be healthy?

What's the one junk food you could never give up to be healthy?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

And how do you take that, exactly?

And how do you take that, exactly?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

–3 parts gin, 1 part dry vermouth, dash of olive brine.”

5. What’s the first dish a cooking beginner should try and master?

What's the first dish a cooking beginner should try and master?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

6. What’s your favorite pattern for a bow tie?

What's your favorite pattern for a bow tie?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

7. What’s the weirdest piece of non-kitchen equipment you’ve ever used to cook?

What's the weirdest piece of non-kitchen equipment you've ever used to cook?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

8. What’s your favorite TV show of all time?

What's your favorite TV show of all time?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

Alton Brown: Wow. Of all time. Out of any TV show?

Lifestyle Hacker: Do we need to rephrase? Should I rephrase the question?

AB: Do you want to rephrase?

BF: I would feel comfortable rephrasing.

AB: All right, go ahead and rephrase. Because we’d be here a while. I’d have to make charts. There would have to be some kind of formula.

OK, rephrase: What’s the TV show you most love to binge-watch?

OK, rephrase: What's the TV show you most love to binge-watch?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

That’s a solid Doctor Who reference, for those of you not in the know.

9. Who’s the most talented chef, dead or alive?

Who's the most talented chef, dead or alive?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

10. What’s your go-to chef’s knife?

What's your go-to chef's knife?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

11. Besides a chef’s knife, what’s the most important kitchen tool?

Besides a chef's knife, what's the most important kitchen tool?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

12. Who’s your celebrity crush?

Who's your celebrity crush?Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

–I dare you to even think of another celebrity crush.”

All right, enough with the tough questions. Time for the WORD ASSOCIATION Lightning Round!

Alton Brown Answers 23 Of Our Most Difficult QuestionsLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

TELL US THE FIRST WORD THAT COMES TO MIND WHEN YOU HEAR THE WORD:

13. Avocado

AvocadoLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

–It comes from the Nahuatl word. •Avocado’ actually comes from a word that means •testicle.’”

14. Beyonc_

Beyonc_Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

15. MSG

MSGLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

–MSG is big business.”

16. Voldemort

VoldemortLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

–He just needs a hugĔ

–No, WAIT.”

"No, WAIT."Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

–He’s got all that power and can’t make a nose. What’s up with that?”

17. Vegetarian

VegetarianLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

18. Gluten-Free

Gluten-FreeLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

C’mon.

C'mon.Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

19. Culinary school

Culinary schoolLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

*Editor’s Note: Both Lifestyle Hacker Life editors involved in writing this post attended culinary school. As did Alton Brown.

20. Glitter

GlitterLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

lol, actuallyÄ

lol, actually...Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

LOL. ACTUALLYÄ

LOL. ACTUALLY...Lauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

21. David Chang

David ChangLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

22. Drones

DronesLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

23. Mayonnaise

MayonnaiseLauren Zaser / Lifestyle Hacker

–You didn’t say it had to be a real word. This is a combination of wonderful and revolting.”

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